God, save our gracious thighs!


Photo: Topman

I recently read an article by the Economist, which brought, quite possibly, the best news I had heard all week.

It was nothing life-changing: no, a band had not released a new album; no, the world hadn’t become 100% reliant on renewable energy; no, I had not received a life-time supply of peanut butter.

No. It was the news skinny jeans are, at last, going out.

For years (well, since 2007-ish), guys and girls have been crushing themselves into hosepipe-like jeans, and stretchy skinny jeans did not solve the problem.

Speaking as a bloke, I will write about it from a gentleman’s perspective, but it likely applies to a lot of women too.

At last, numerous high street stores are bringing bootcut back, loose jeans, and women are able to buy flared jeans again.

Skinny jeans were cool, perhaps, when you were listening to 30 Seconds to Mars, and did little other than play videos games.

However, the average man’s waist size is 35 inches in the UK, and it is good to know the trend of leg-strapped jeans is moving with the times.

Of course, large waist lines and thick thighs are not exactly to be celebrated, but even the mildly fit man is struggling to find jeans that look good, and fit well.

A typical jeans shop will go like this for myself.

I have been a 29-30 inch waist since I was 17, and so I will often pick out a 30 inch pair of trousers.

Get to the changing room, and – lo and behold – they are ball-bustlingly tight. My current jeans are a 34 inch waist, simply because nothing below that gets close to fitting around my legs and backside.

There is always the old joke of guys who lift never finding jeans which fit, but for the love of all things denim, it does not take much to exceed the drainpipe size most jean retailers provide.

Levi’s have been staple in my wardrobe for a couple of years now, as they appear to be the only brand which actually allow room for movement in their jeans.

All I can say is “Hallelujah” and “God save our gracious thighs!” to this news.


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